The Millennial Mermaid

It’s been quite awhile, I know. Things have been going really crazy, I wonder if this is a nightmare or a dream I’ll wake up from. Nevertheless, to update you all on a special project that is close to my heart, my baby – Millennial Mermaid.

While I still cannot let go of this blog because it holds so much memories and I’m sentimental, I will still be updating this and linking this to my current website. I hope you guys will check my new baby out. Here is the reason why I created the Millennial Mermaid in the first place. Enjoy!

Love,

Ferina

How Not to Drown

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter One

I sometimes wonder if I’ll ever get out of this rut I’m in. Some people say it’s quarter-life crisis hitting me hard. Others say that I’m getting to know myself better. That I’m finding who I really am.

After two years of searching outside and within, I finally know what I want to do. It’s just that, I don’t know how I’ll ever break out with probably a million others who have the same dreams as I do. Out of so many fish in the sea, how do I stand out? How do I be different from all the rest?

I never realized how much I loved writing until I almost forgot that I enjoyed doing it so much. I almost forgot about something I loved to do because I stopped doing it. I stopped doing it for myself. I just stopped.

I overheard this in the office sometime last week.

“I feel empty. It’s not that I don’t like the job I have now, I actually enjoy it. I just feel like there’s something missing inside me and I don’t know what it is.”

Then it hit me. I wasn’t alone.

Waiting for Life to Happen

Do not.

Do not wait for your life to happen.

It is already happening. You are alive.

Life does not happen the moment you get promoted.

It does not begin when you get a boyfriend or get married.

Life happens during those dark lonely hours when you feel you’re unloved.

Life happens when you cry in pain because exercising seems too much of a struggle but you need to do it.

Life happens in moments when you just don’t know what to do next.

It’s okay not to know what to do next.

What is NOT okay is to not know what to do or where you’re going.

At least know what you want to do now.

Yes, now.

Write? Go write.

Want to look and feel better? Hit the pool or gym or whatever makes you feel healthier.

Buy that bikini? Go ahead, splurge a little. You deserve to spend sometimes.

Do what you want to do now.

Do what makes you feel alive and what makes others feel alive, joyful.

Start with one thing and keep doing it.

Do not stop if it brings you joy.

Do not stop if it brings you satisfaction.

Do not stop if you are scared.

Life is about risk. You are not risking anything if you are not afraid.

So go on, do the first thing on your almost-forgotten list.

But let me remind you again, that life is not waiting for you to make it happen.

Life is happening.

Life is now.

You are alive.

Go and feel it.

Yes, you are alive.

You just have to choose and to act.

Do it now.

You’ll never get back the second you spent reading the next word.

Just go and do it.

Love life.

Live.

 

A Mermaid’s Tail

 

As a child, playing along the ocean’s shores never gave the same joy when swimming beneath the waves. Imagining with my entire little child mind that a mermaid would want to swim up and invite me to live in their castle under the sea.

Without a moment of hesitation, I’d grab her hand and go. Fishes swim before my eyes and I quickly chase them. After all, they could lead me to their mermaid friends.

I know you what you might be thinking. This writer doesn’t know a thing about tales! That’s what she should have written in her title. Sorry but this is really a tale about my tail.

Anatomically speaking, mermaids have tails. It’s the end of a beautiful womanlike creature that is supposed to have legs instead of a fish tail. Mysterious, elusive and captivating…

Yes, they do exist! Please do not give me a lecture that just like Santa Claus, mermaids are our parents’ figment of imagination.

Mermaids are real and they are here. They live amongst us. Trying hard to blend in with the land-loving two legged creatures called humans, these mermaids have albeit slowly found their voices back.

Poor broken things, they lost their tails and could not swim. Forced to adapt to unfamiliar land, they had to survive or else lose their species entirely.

The tail is what propels these mermaids down to great depths. They seemed to have forgotten how to breathe underwater but some of them can reach up to a minute beneath the sea!

I guess like learning how to sing, practice makes you reach notes you haven’t reached before. Now these modern mermaids need to keep singing the song of the ocean, this time only louder. Bolder than before, even if they only have the tips of their tails to start the ocean song.

So first, you find your voice. Then you find your tail. Afterwards, all you need is a big ocean of salty freedom and the song is all yours to swim – err sing.

Life Stories: An Introduction

 

What is life?

 

It’s a huge book of stories.

 

Stories that last seconds.

Stories that last days.

Stories that make up a year or two.

Stories formed in many ways.

 

Stories waiting to be written.

Some waiting to be told.

Most often than not these are stories are what makes our life so gold.

 

Stories take time.

One minute of everyday.

You have the option to choose how to write it, if you have the chance one day.

 

So while I still have time left, I’ve decided to do something so I won’t forget.

Life is made up of stories, of memories we took part.

Writing these down, at least once a day will help leave a mark.

 

I need to write.

I need to remember.

Like this love, that touch, his laughter.

 

This is the beginning of my life’s memories.

And this are my…

 

Why You Shouldn’t Go on Vacations

The thing about vacations is that at the end of it, you’ll start to hate why you even bothered to go on one in the first place. It’s that post-vacation depression that starts to consume you the moment you start packing your things up, saying goodbye to the new friends you’ve found and getting in that vehicle that will transport you away from the happy place you’ve called home for the past four days.

It’s only been one night since I arrived back in the city and every time I think of the mornings I spent watching the sun rise and set for the past four days, I get teary-eyed. I start to wonder why I can’t just spend the rest of my life living on the beach where everything seems to slow down and all you have to care about is the here and now. Will the surf be up tomorrow? If not, should we be doing yoga while the sun rises or should we sleep in longer to catch up on the lost sleep from the night’s stargazing session on the sand?

It all starts from the moment I arrive, You know, the all-too-familiar feeling of being all too excited to do every single thing you dreamed about doing for months? Yes, that’s what I felt since I decided to schedule this vacation. From the moment you take off your slippers and feel the velvety soft sand warm your toes as you run across the shore, to the rejuvenating splash as you dive into the unusually clear waters of the ocean – every single nerve in my body was tingling with life.

What was most exhilarating was the good news of surf. When your surf buddies release the words “Naay balod” (surf’s up!) the adrenaline starts pumping real bad. I run towards the hut grabbing the wax and doing a superhero move to change from land clothes to my surf costume. Every ounce of my body was shaking from excitement. I didn’t mind the 9-foot plus longboard I was carrying. I had to rush to the spot, the quicker I get there the more waves I can catch. After all, the waves don’t wait for anyone.

Carefully traipsing across the reef rocks, making sure I don’t cut myself, I get the leash on quick and jump on. Paddling out, I can’t help the looking at the bottom getting deeper. It is a bit scary not knowing what really lies underneath and what could probably jump out of the water any moment but those thoughts die a natural death when I see the waves breaking towards me. Paddling faster to avoid getting caught by the incoming wave, the excitement just grows ever stronger.

You know the lulls in between waiting for the sets to arrive? This has to be one of my favorites aside from actually riding the waves. That lull means I can catch my breath and watch my buddies paddle hard to catch the wave like nothing else mattered. That lull also means I can cheer for them when they finish that long ride. It also means I can sit on my board and look back to see a potential wave I can catch.

Lulls give me time to just thank God for the moment I am in. For the moment of being tossed by the waves and pulled under to the moment of breaking through the surface to breathe, pure gratitude and bliss was all I felt.

These brief escapes from reality tend to leave my heart longing for more of these escapes, which I probably won’t be having for a long time given the current circumstances that hound my professional life. Don’t get me wrong, I love my corporate life. It’s exciting and makes me feel like a legit adult. Although there’s always that part of me that longs to be part of the world that I loved ever since and that’s being one with the ocean, be it surfing or snorkeling or diving ever deeper until my breath stops me.

 

*Article originally appeared on my old blog, A Pink Banana, last Nov. 1, 2014.

I fell in love with the Sea

I Fell in Love with the Sea 

 

I fell in love with the Sea,

as she was staring back at me,

like it always did ever since.

 

When I was a child, I’d play with her.

And the Sea would swallow me and spit me back whenever it was time for dinner.

How Being Afraid Made All the Difference

 

I’ve been away for too long.

I hate to admit it but I ran away. I ran away from the things that I knew deep down that I loved the most. I hid from my words. I ran from the light. I didn’t know it then but I was trapped in the lies I made for myself.

I was afraid. I was afraid of really knowing what I was made of. Before one can know what one is made of, there are hurdles one has to pass. I was terrified of these. I was scared to death of rejection.